


It's Time To Say Goodbye

by HelaHiddles



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Break Up, Crying, Established Relationship, F/M, Pepperony - Freeform, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-08
Updated: 2013-05-08
Packaged: 2017-12-10 20:03:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/789620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HelaHiddles/pseuds/HelaHiddles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pepper and Tony are fighting more and more, Pepper has to do what's best for herself.</p>
<p>Songfic to Gwyneth Paltrow - Turning Tables cover</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Time To Say Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Starkspectacular](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starkspectacular/gifts).



> This was an idea I got yesterday and it basically just wrote itself. It's a sort of reality I think could happen if Tony didn't let Pepper in the way he does in the movies. I think this could have been a possibility for them if just a few minor things were different. I listened to her singing Turning Tables the whole time while writing and it was listening to that which gave me the idea in the first place. I needed an outlet for my feels ^^ Enjoy!! Or maybe not but.... read away and don't be shy to let me know what you think.

"NO!" He shouted one more time as he pushed her away and she gasped at the sheer force of it as her back hit the wall. Tony was beyond furious and unreasonable so she kept quiet as he started throwing things around the lab mindlessly. It was time to give up the argument.. for tonight. She could not take the pain any longer, she turned her back on the chaos before her tears started to fall and she made her way up to their bedroom quickly.

She crawled into bed, making sure to keep to her side, she turned her back to the door that led to the lit up hallway as she sobbed softly into the pillow in the dark room. What was she supposed to do? He did not let her in anymore and when she asked him to talk to her it turned into a fight instead. Her tears soaked the white pillowcase as she sobbed softly to herself. She could no longer get through to him and this living situation was hurting her beyond words.

After a long while of not finding the peace of mind to sleep, tears still rolling onto the pillow, she heard the door creek open. It was quiet and her soft sobs could be heard as Tony seemed to get undressed swiftly and crawl into bed, facing her back.

"Honey I am so sorry... I don't know what came over me." He spoke softly as he lied down and slipped an arm around her waist. His voice sounded rough and broken, trembling slightly as he spoke and she drew a shaky breath.

"Pep.. I love you, I'm sorry." He spoke again, his voice almost at a whisper now as he raised a hand to stroke her hair softly. He was being so gentle and he sounded so sincere, she could not help leaning into his touch lightly. He pulled her in closer and kissed the back of her neck softly, murmuring words of affection and love as her tears subsided. He was being sweet and kind.. she knew he didn't mean to be cruel and it was only his temper acting up or something triggering his PTSD. It was fine.. it was okay.

\---------------------------------------------------

Close enough to start a war  
All that I have is on the floor  
God only knows what we're fighting for  
All that I say, you always say more  
I can't keep up with your turning tables  
Under your thumb, I can't breathe

\-------------------------------------------------

"What am I supposed to do, Tony? Just sit back and watch you starve and not sleep until I lose you?!" She yelled desperately, trying so har to get her point through so Tony would understand her side of this whole thing. Tony only saw his side and what he thought was best for her.

"I'm not asking you to do anything! I'm fine!" He yelled back at her, throwing a wrench against the wall and she flinched slightly at the sound. "You don't have to save me, Pep! That's not in your job description!" He screamed angrily and her face just fell, all the anger washing away as she started at Tony who was fuming a few feet infront of her.

"I thought we were more than that.. I thought we had love and trust and it wasn't just work now.. But if that's what you want." She spoke solemnly.. calmly, too calmly since what she really wanted to do was fall to the floor and cry her eyes out.

"Maybe that's exactly what I want!" He spat angrily before swiping several items off a work bench besides him. "Damn it, Pep! I can't handle this anymore. I'm not good, I'm not who you make me out to be. I don't need you.. I don't love you!" He shouted at her and the last sentence was worse than a slap across the face and she backed up slightly.

"Ok.. fine.. if that's how you feel." She whispered, not being able to hold back the tears any longer as she backed up to the door, turning and walking up the stairs and out the door. Her vision was blurry as she made her way into the car and drove to her apartment. Maybe she had conciously kept it because she knew this would never work. She walked into her apartment, the furniture still in place and the lights still working. It was like she had never left and she fell to the floor, crying into her hands. She was falling apart and she could not handle this anymore, she could not stand Tony's constant back and forth with her, it was breaking her heart everyday. Was this what love was? Because no matter what happened she did love Tony and she knew he was struggling with a lot of issues.. but was this really a healthy relationship? Or was it just making them both worse? This was not normal..

She got up off the floor, sucking in a deep breath and wiping her tears. No she didn't feel like crying like a lost puppy without Tony, she was stronger than that.. right? She went into her bedroom, despite the early hour, and changed for bed, crawling into the cool sheets with a sigh. She could figure this all out tomorrow.

\-------------------------------------------------

Under haunted skies I see  
Where love is lost, your ghost is found  
I've braved a hundred storms to leave you  
As hard as you try, no, I will never be knocked down  
I can't keep up with your turning tables  
Under your thumb, I can't breathe

\--------------------------------------------------------

The morning sun woke her up late the next day and she felt better already, it was amazing how sleep could make you feel so much better. But when she checked her phone, the good mood fell away and her stomach dropped. She had 70 texts and 39 missed calls from Tony Stark and she swallowed hard. She was not going through all those texts but they had a lot of exclamation points so she already did not like it, something sent a chill down her spine. She was just about to call Tony when there was a loud banging on the door.

"Pepper! Please! Open up.." He was shouting through the door and she sighed, feeling tired again in such a short time. It must have been the banging that woke her up even if she had not realized it. Tony sounded upset, frantic even, and on the verge of breaking the door in so she pulled on a robe and rushed to the door.

"Calm down.." She sighed as she opened the door and Tony rushed into the apartment, pacing around the rooms before turning to look at her. His eyes were red but she could not tell if it was because he had been crying or not sleeping at all since she left. Probably the second option considering the state of her phone this morning.. Maybe both.

"Calm down!? I thought something had happened. You didn't answer all night and didn't respond to any of my texts. I was terrified!" She noticed he was shaking and his voice was unsteady as he spoke frantically. Her shoulders slumped at his words.. He had been scared, she should have told him where she went at least.

"I'm sorry, Pep." He sighed after a while and walked over, wrapping her in a warm embrace and she felt herself relaxing at the gentle touch. He was holding her so carefully and stroking her long, messy hair gently with his strong hands. "I didn't mean it, ok? I love you.. You mean everything to me. I didn't know where you were and it scared me.. I need you." He mumbled softly against her ear and she hugged him back tighter, kissing the side of his face softly. "I love you too." She mumbled back, just like she always did and everything felt right again. She needed him just as much as he needed her and she couldn't let go, couldn't push him away. Most days he was so good and sweet and loving and that was what love was, right? Taking the good with the bad and being there for each other.. She needed to be there for Tony.

\-----------------------------------------------------

Next time I'll be braver, I'll be my own savior  
When the thumb that cost me  
Next time I'll be braver, I'll be my own savior  
Standing on my own two feet

\-------------------------------------------------

"Why won't you let me help you!?" She shouted loudly from her spot by the window in the large bedroom. She asked the question that had been the topic of conversation, if you could call it conversation, for the past few hours and they were both growing tired. She watched Tony run his hands through his hair and pacing the room furiously.

"I don't need help! Can't you just drop it?" He was basically fuming at her and she could only muster up the energy to sigh.

"Yes you do.. You can't live like this.. WE can't live like this." She tried to keep her voice steady and calm but she was so far beyond frustrated that it proved very hard. She was standing with her back to the window, watching Tony pace back and forth on the otherside of his bed.. their bed.

"Tony.." She started to speak again but was cut short when Tony wipped around to face her, walking towards her angrily. She swallowed and watched him get closer, for the first time in her entire life feeling scared of Tony. He felt so.. unpredictable at the moment.

"I'm fine, ok? Just drop it. Can't we just have one nice evening together without you prying into my head.. I'm fine!" He shouted the last couple of words in her face and she flinched back slightly, backing up against the window.

"How can we have a nice evening when you're hiding things from me. I'm not stupid, Tony and I know you haven't slept for four days. Just let me help you." She basically pleaded with the man infront of her and she should have known she pushed too hard, dropped it too late. The next thing she knows he pushes her hard into the window, knocking her head against the glass which makes her instantly dizzy.

"NO! I don't need help! I don't need you!" He shouted before slamming his fist right against the wall besides her head as hard as he could. Then he screamed in frustration before turning his back on her, leaving the room, leaving her on her own. She immediately sank to the floor, shaking and silent tears were falling from her eyes in despair.

She could not possibly do this anymore, she couldn't. He was hurting her and he scared her out of her mind sometimes. Her head was throbbing like a reminder of what she had to do and she got up on shaky legs slowly, tears still falling rapidly. She had to put herself first for the first time in her life.

She got her biggest duffelbag out of the closet and filled it with her most valuable possessions slowly. Books, some clothes, shoes, make-up and brush.. But she left most things, the things Tony had bought her or things she had bought for herself from him. The bag ended up only half full but she didn't want anything else with her as she stepped into her favorite shoes and left the room for the last time. As suspected Tony was down in the lab taking his anger out on his suits and she made her way to the front door.

"Don't you dare tell Tony I'm leaving." She mumbled as she put her key down on the table by the door. She looked up at the ceiling, lips still trembling and tears still falling and she could have sworn she heard the AI sigh lightly.

"As you wish, Miss. Potts." He spoke and that was all she needed to hear. But before she left this house for good she stopped and got a piece of paper from the office and a pen. She needed to write a note so he would not come looking for her. She was done and she did not want 39 missed calls tomorrow. She layed the paper under the key neatly before scribbling down the last words Tony would ever hear from her.

I love you  
But I need to love myself more  
Please be safe  
// Pepper

Then she walked out the door and closed it softly behind her, leaving behind her life with Tony and all the pain her heart had endured over the past years. She left it all as she got into her car and drove, not home, but to her friend who lived several cities away. She needed distance as well as someone who would understand. She lowered the top of the sports car and let the wind dry her still falling tears as she steared the car west towards her destination. Not once did she doubt her decision.

\-------------------------------------------------------

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no  
I won't ask you, you to just desert me  
I can't give you what you think you gave me  
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables, turning tables


End file.
